SPOtastic

9 Down 74 to go

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Sun, 29 Jun 2008 04:03:00 +0000

Update! I just finished The Road by Cormac McCarthy.

That is the 9th Pulitzer Prize winning novel I have read, I have 74 more to go.

Books!

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Sat, 21 Jun 2008 07:29:00 +0000

I have always been a reader. As a little girl I would go to the library and check out as many books as possible. Reading a good book always psyches me up to reading more. As a young girl I have fond memories of reading Madeleine L'Engle, James Herriot, and a weird and unnecessary phase of Sweet Valley High.

I went home last weekend and cleaned out my room a bit (Yes, my mom has kept my room as a shrine), and decided I would donate as many books as I could let go of.

Most of my comedy related books I have donated to the UCBT Library. You're welcome student who has been chomping at the bit to read Brett Buttler's Autobiography. (FYI, click the link, Brett Butler is looking for some web help.)

I donated all my animal books, but Born Free, Gorilla's in the Mist and my Jane Goodall books, to the Chester County Library.

And I donated all of my Basketball books, minus my autographed copy of Charles Barkely's Autobiography to the Chester County Library. Basketball books? Yeah, I was a huge fan of B-ball from Middle School Through College.

Sample list of donated B-ball books:
For You Hank – Bo Kimble
My Life – Earvin “Magic” Johnson
The Winner Within – Pat Riley
Shaq Attaq! – Shaquille O’Neal
Rare AIR – Michael on Michael – Masturbatory photo essay
Bob Knight: His Own Man – Joan Mellen
Magic Touch – Earvin “Magic Johnson , Jr. and Roy S. Johnson

I was bonkers for B-ball people! Jealous?

Anyway, why am I sharing this? Because I have decided to take on a book reading challenge.
I am going to read all of the Pulitzer Prize winning Novels/Fiction works.
When I find that I enjoy a particular Author or style of book, I tend to go nuts for them by reading as many as possible (Chuck Pahlaniuk, Joyce Carol Oates, Mad Magazine Cartoon books). I have found that I enjoy reading Pullitzer Prize winning Books. Crazy right?

I am not sure how long it will take, but I am going to guess years. Before I took on the challenge I had already read:

Grapes of Wrath
Confederacy of Dunces
The Hours
Interpreter of Maladies
The Amazing Adventures of Cavelier and Clay
Middlesex

I decided that I would work my way to the middle, reading the newest, then oldest etc etc. So I read 2008 winner "The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao," and I am now in the middle of 1918's winner "His Family."
I will probably only repeat read The Grapes of Wrath, as the others I have read in the last 5 years.

I have not decided yet if I will take on the General Non-Fiction winners list. I will atleast try one and see how much my brain can take. For some reason truth is not as fun as untruth to my mind.

Anyway, thats what I'll be doing for the next few years, while I mix in some other books along the way, like Cesar Millan's "Be the Pack Leader."

80 plus books to go!

New Blogject

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Fri, 20 Jun 2008 05:00:00 +0000

Spo Like, Luz Hate: Opinions by a Lady and her Dog

I guess we'll see how this goes......

Why do you have a....

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Sat, 14 Jun 2008 02:15:00 +0000

I am home in Malvern, PA. My mother does not have the internet, so every time I visit I get in my car and drive around looking for some wifi to steal. Tonight she told me she wanted to go out for the drive with me. My initial search left me hopeless and frustrated since the Nextel store I used to steal it from closed down and is now a Cancer Research Donation Center, which is great, but they someone needs to donate wifi that is not password protected. Hot and frustrated I decided to drive my mom home so I could drop her off before I got too cranky.

As I turned into the our neighborhood, I noticed that on her lap and under her purse there was a flashlight.

SPO: Why do you have a flashlight with you?
PAM: I left the front porch light off.
SPO: Why?
PAM: To save money.
SPO: Well make sure you use the money you save for a rape kit.
PAM: What?
SPO: Let me give you 5 bucks so you can leave the porch light on for the next 5 years.
PAM: (laughs) Leave me alone.

(This entry has been blogged from a Holiday Inn Express parking lot in Exton PA.)

Charleston South Carolina

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Mon, 09 Jun 2008 06:28:00 +0000

Yesterday I returned home from a week long workaction. Imagine hanging out at the beach all day long with your friends, and then performing an improv show at night with your friends. Not bad right? For the past 4 years, UCB Tour Co has been invited to participate in the Piccolo Spoleto Fringe Festival. Tour Co is very fortunate to have a relationship with the The Have Nots, an amazing improv group down in Charleston. Not only are they amazing performers, but they are great people off stage as well.

This year we tried to get to know our audience a little better, as well as Charleston the town. Here are 15 things I learned about Charleston and its people.

1. Litter - they don't do it. The beach, the streets, all clean.
2. DUI - they all do it. Apparently driving drunk is so common that cops are baffled by people passing field sobriety tests. One Audience member told us he was pulled over 15 times and never received a ticket. And he was over the legal limit.
3. Hitting Cops with your Vehicle is okay. TWO audience members told us they hit a cop with their car. The cops were on foot. Neither of them went to jail or received a ticket.
4. Fireworks. Legal to buy, illegal to light, but cops don't care. We bought Fireworks at South of the Border and lit them off at the Beach around 2am. We were told by locals it was illegal to do, but nobody gets in trouble for doing it.
5. Sea Turtles can not tell the difference between a porch light and the moon.
6. The coroner of Charleston is an elected position. And upon further research I learned the following: To qualify as a candidate for Coroner, an individual must 1) be a citizen of the United States; 2) for at least one year, be a resident of the county in which he or she seeks the office; 3) be a registered voter; 4) attain the age of 21 before the date of qualifying for office; 5) have earned a high school or equivalent diploma; and 6) not have been convicted of a felony offense or any offense involving immoral behavior.
7. Jestine's Coca Cola cake should be illegal.
8. Several Celebrities have houses in Charleston, and one of their Butlers was in our audience. He would not tell us who he buttled for, the only thing I know is that it was a woman and the weirdest thing he had to do for her was feed her dog. She sounds like a real asshole.
9. Blueberry Martini's from Wild Wings Cafe are a great way to avoid the taste of alcohol but still feel the effects.
10. 6 people CAN order 40 dollars worth of Taco Bell at 2 am.
11. Harris Teeter's should always be called "The Teets" for short.
12. Emergency rooms on a Tuesday Night do not get a lot of action.
13. Bicycle cabs are very popular.
14. Southerners get offended when you remind them that they used to own slaves.
15. Boiled Peanuts are gross, Fried peanuts are okay.

test

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Sun, 08 Jun 2008 05:56:00 +0000

Is this thing on?

Running

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Tue, 27 May 2008 15:29:00 +0000

In October 2006 I ran a marathon. I finished in exactly 4 hours and 30 minutes. I was both proud and frustrated with this time. It is not bad finish time for a first time marathon (and runner), but I also walked about 2 of the miles because of an injury.

I went to rehab for my IT Band and in April 2007 was given the green light to run again. I built myself back up to 5 miles and ran 5 times a week at this distance for a month or so. I got into the NYC Half Marathon, then Satch got sick and passed away. I stopped running for a few weeks. I dusted my sadness off my shoes and started back up, I was not ready for the 1/2 marathon, but I started training for the Philadelphia Marathon that was scheduled for mid November. I was doing well with my training, as part of it I ran the Queens Half Marathon and felt great. But I did too much too fast. My pride gets in the way sometimes. I felt like running another marathon would prove something to other people. Running is an individual sport though, there really is nothing to prove but to myself that I can use running as a tool to be healthy. I was not using it in a healthy way. I pushed too much to fast and In Mid October during a scheduled long run my injury from the previous year returned. October 12th was the last time I went for a run. It was 15 plus miles, it was cold and it sucked because my leg started hurting and I was about 2 or 3 miles form the hotel I was staying at while on a Tour Co trip. What made it seem worse was we were right on the border of Washington and Iowa. My hotel was in Iowa, I started limping in Washington. I cried during those last two miles off and on.

Running should never cause negative feelings, but when you feel defeated with anything, even the things you love can feel destructive.

Yesterday I went to Prospect Park for a fun Memorial BBQ with friends. I wound up playing ultimate Frisbee and woke up a bit sore. This soreness reminded me that I have really let my body go a bit and it is time to get back in the game.

2 hours ago I put on my running shoes, socks, bra, shorts and shirt and went for a run. I was not going to push myself. I was going to be smart. I had a goal of 1.5 miles, no stopping no matter what. I went a bit over 2. I felt like I could have done more. Which means I know I can do more, and with time I will. Muscles have memories, and my muscles remember what a good feeling it is to finish a run. I have a touch of the runners high right now. I am excited to wake up tomorrow and run again. You know what else has a memory? My running shirt. It smelled like BO within minutes of putting it on.

A Mouse on a Cat on a Dog.

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Thu, 22 May 2008 18:38:00 +0000

Proof that animals would make better people.

What's a Period?

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Thu, 08 May 2008 18:42:00 +0000

You can thank Carter Edwards for this one.

I recommend Part two also.

Stink-Finder

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Wed, 07 May 2008 06:12:00 +0000

Luz has adjusted very well and is now roaming the apartment free when we are not home. I have not found any accidents, but I also know that just because you don't find it, doesn't mean it doesn't exist.

So I bought a Stink-finder!

This lovely gadget will quickly illuminate traces of odor-causing urine, vomit, feces, or saliva.

This purchase will not only show me if/where Luz has done her business, but it will show me where I have been leaving my own.

VOTE THIS WEEKEND

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Thu, 24 Apr 2008 18:44:00 +0000

Eliza Skinner is a smart & funny woman.
She has reminded me of a very important vote that we all have to make this weekend.

The vote for smart, funny women.

Go see Baby Mama! This weekend!

On January 1st 2008, I made a list of three things I was excited about.
1. Baby Mama
2. Grand Theft Auto IV
3. Gangsta Rap: The Glockumentary

This weekend I will see BABY MAMA!!!

Also, go to babymaker.com and do something fun like this -

This guy + This guy

EQUALS

Amber Alert!

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 04:31:00 +0000

If you issued an Amber Alert for your missing Fetus - it has been found!

HOUSTON -- A fetus was found aboard a Continental jet at Bush Intercontinental Airport Sunday afternoon. The fetus was discovered in one of the plane’s bathrooms by a cleaning crew, the Houston police department told 11 News.

Flight 433 from New York’s LaGuardia Airport landed at Gate C-18 of Terminal C at Bush IAH about 4:45 p.m. Sunday. Officials said all of the passengers disembarked the plane and that the cleaning crew did not arrive until about two hours later.

A member of the cleaning crew found the fetus in one of the rear bathrooms of the plane.

The Houston Police Department and the FBI are investigating.

Cocaine, I must Say.

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Fri, 28 Mar 2008 00:33:00 +0000

Mike Still gifted me this wonderful gem.

A series of found photos from garage sales, garbage bins and general absent mindedness.

Seeing this reminded me that I am still on the hunt for a misplaced set of photos from Halloween 1987. I was dressed as Ed Grimley.

Plaid shirt, hiked up pants and 6lbs of hairspray. I worked on my impression for a couple of weeks. I went to school and answered questions in as Ed Grimley. I had a good time.
My mom knew I loved it so much, she said we could dedicate an entire Kodak Disk to photos of me doing different "totally mental" things. Using an entire disk of film was "fancy" for us. So I made sure to make every picture count.

Grimley on the Space Trolley in our front yard.
Grimley on top of the shed.
Grimley putting something in the mailbox.
Grimley making a sandwhich.
Grimley behind the wheel of a car.

We dropped the photos off at the Drug Emporium for development. I could not wait to get the photos back. Back then, opening the envelope of newly developed film was like Christmas morning. Unfortunately when we got the film back, it was 24 photos of two fucking kids on swings. The only photos of me as Ed Grimley were lost. The Drug Emporium employee said he would send the photos back to the developer and let them know there was a mistake.

I was crying, out of control mad, so when I got home, I threw a bunch of bricks at a tree. (This is what my mom told me to do when I got mad. It was better than breaking shit in my room.) My Mom asked if I wanted to put my costume back on and take another disk.

"No. The moment is gone."

I probably ate a box of pudding pops after that and slept off my sad/angry/pudding coma.

So anyway - if any of you come across some photos of a slightly chubby 6th grade girl dressed as Ed Grimley - please let me know.

Also, if a tree with a bunch of brick marks on his face comes looking for me, you don't know me.

Happy Mutha Fuckin V-day

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Thu, 14 Feb 2008 19:50:00 +0000

(Thank you Alex Sidtis for showing me this)

Congrats Uno!

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Wed, 13 Feb 2008 15:22:00 +0000

50% of Luz says Congrats to Uno! Best in Show at Westminster.

The other 50% just farted in my face!

sheeeeeeeeeeeeiiitttt

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Mon, 11 Feb 2008 06:49:00 +0000

I am now caught up on The Wire.

I was on a 6 week detail of 4.5 Seasons.

I'm On Demand and a week ahead.

Indeed.

Let's figure out the clocks bitches!

pretty boring -

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Fri, 25 Jan 2008 06:08:00 +0000

1/23
7am - wake up and walk Luz
7:30 - watch The Wire S3E6
8:20 - Take Luz to dog park
9:30 - Home, give Luz Bath, take Shower
10am - Leave for work.
11a-1p - Manage Worlds best comedy school
1-4pm - Teach Improv
4-7 - Continue to Manage
7-10pm - Coach worlds tallest Improv Team
10p-1a - Continue to Manage
1a - picked up by hubby
2:a -try to fall asleep
2a-8a -Sleep
8am - wake up, walk Luz & move Car
8:30 - Shower!
9:15 a - Leave for work
10:30-7pm - Manage Worlds best comedy school
7-10pm -Teach Improv
10-11:30 - Manage
12:30a - arrive home

Currently - Watching House Wives of Orange County with adorable dog sleeping in my lap.

1/25 estimate
8am -Wake up walk Luz
9am - Workout???
10:30 - leave for work
11:30-6:30 - Manage worlds best comedy school
6:30-8:30 - Rehearse with Stepfathers
8:30-9:30 - Bits
9:30-10:45 - Improvise

10:45p- Take that shit I forgot about on Tuesday
11pm - call hubby to see if he still remembers who I am.

I'm sorry it took so long....

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Tue, 15 Jan 2008 04:12:00 +0000

When I worked at 60 Minutes II, my office was across the way from a man named George Crile. Sometimes he would be at his desk for weeks, I'd never see him leave. Then he would disappear for a month, sometimes two. He was a journalist, so his absences were normal. But he rarely had a piece on the air, so I was curious.

"Where has George been?" I would ask.
"Where hasn't he been." my boss lady would respond.

I would be reorganizing filing cabinets, or looking for more area's to store files, and I would always find tapes or files that belonged to George. One time I found where he hid his office key. He had been gone for several weeks. I was there in my office when he returned from whatever trip he was on, and he knew to ask.

"Shannon, can I get my key?"

He wasn't there when I found it, but he had the information. He knew how to get what he needed.

I wanted to ask him so many questions, but I was too shy, and I also had a weird fear. If I asked him things, he would probably tell me. And did I want that knowledge? I was positive he knew stuff that very few people knew.

I think I am making him sound weird. He wasn't. When he was in town, he was one of few people at the office that took in interest in what I did outside of work. He always asked when I was performing, I always told him. I never saw him at a show, and he never told me he came to one, but I have a feeling he was probably there. He was one of my favorite people at work, and I never told him.

I finally learned that he had been working on a book that was eventually titled "Charlie Wilson's War." He had been working on the book since the late 80's. It was 2001 when I first heard about it his book. Then 9/11 happened. Whenever George disappeared, I just imagined him having an off the record talk with Osama Bin Ladin.

Charlie Wilson's War was published in 2004. Being the cheap penny pincher I am, I was hoping I would find a complimentary copy on my desk one morning. It never happened. The book was an instant best seller and then I learned Tom Hanks bought the rights to it, and that Mike Nichols was going to direct it. I had to get off my ass and read the book.

60 Minutes II was canceled in May of 2005. I remember seeing George on my final day that June. He asked me if I could still help him with his expenses. I told him it was my last day and I wouldn't be able to. I felt guilty. He had asked me a month or two earlier and I said I would. But of course it took George a while to find all his receipts that were scattered about the different cabinets they were living in. I felt guilty that I couldn't help him. But I had to move on.

Thing was I really didn't. I still had not read his book.

May 2006 in a correspondence with my Boss lady, I learned that George had passed away of Pancreatic Cancer. She knew I was fond of him and how much it would upset me.

I still had not read his book, and now I was feeling super guilty, so I bought the book.

January 12th 2008. I finally finished. I could be cliche and say it was worth the wait, but I wish I had not waited. The book is awesome. If you want to an awesome spy novel, that is not a novel but a true story. Read this book. If you saw the movie, well the movie is just based on the true story, and does not even touch the surface of this amazing tale. The movie actually pissed me off. I felt like it dishonored the life's work of George. (I saw the movie Jan 13th.)

Now I have lots of new questions for George.

I'm sorry it took so long.

Luz on the Loose!

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Wed, 12 Dec 2007 05:16:00 +0000

Hola Amigos & Amigas!

Guess what? I scared the shit out of SPO & AVM today. I didn't mean to of course. I'm not used to having so much fun and all this love and I got so excited I spooked myself. SPO & AVM took me for a walk (I pooped by the way, "GOOD POOP!" as these humans say). Anyway, we were rounding the corner to go back inside and SPO was sensing that I wanted to run (I love to run!). Well I took off fast, and then SPO caught up and I stopped suddenly and my leash flew out of her hands and the shit bag container smacked the ground. The noise spooked me and I took off with my leash bouncing along behind me. I don't think anyone has ever seen an animal run as fast as I did. I am not from around here, so I really didn't know where I was going. I just ran. I later learned I was running towards a busy road. I heard screams and my owners yelling "Luuuuuz! LUUUUUZ!" But I don't know what the word means yet, they have been saying it the past four days, so I'm sure it is something important, and after tonight I definitely know it is. Scary story short, as I ran towards this busy road my leash wrapped around the tire of a parked car. I yelped pretty loud when this happened because it pulled me back and I broke a nail off my paw. OUCH! AVM got to me first, followed by SPO. SPO held me close as AVM released my leash from the tire. AVM was holding it together better then SPO, she was shaking and crying harder than me! We walked back towards the apartment when SPO noticed blood all over her hand and coat. My paw was bleeding pretty bad. So off to the emergency animal hospital I went! I licked my paw pretty clean by the time the doctor saw me. He gave me a shot of some pain killer and an anti-biotic to avoid infection. I am pretty much back to normal already though, I just have keep my paw clean and SPO said no running unless I am surrounded by a fence.

Okay, I better get to bed, I've had a crazy day!

I hope to meet you guys soon!

waggles,

Hello, My Name is Luz

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Sun, 09 Dec 2007 17:03:00 +0000

Hola World!

My name is Luz (Spanish for Light) and yesterday I found my forever home. SPO & AVM adopted me from the North Shore Animal League. I was very scared at the shelter. I have had a rough life so far. I'm only a year old and I have already had a litter of puppies. I'm starting to relax a bit, but I still have some work to do. So far I've discovered that I do not like getting on elevators, but SPO convinced me that it is okay, so earlier this afternoon I walked on myself, SPO didn't even have to pick me up!

I haven't quite figure out where I should go to bathroom. I think I'm supposed to go when I am on a walk outside, but just to cover my bases I took a shit and pissed in the living room last night. No worries, SPO cleaned it up and brought me outside where I finished my business. Hopefully I'll figure that part out soon.

I don't know if you can tell, but I'm part Beagle, part Terrier and 100% Lady. A mix of breeds to keep SPO & AVM on their toes. I'm about 15 lbs and I have an adorable curl in my tail. My tail might be too big for my own body, I tend to hit myself with it when I wag with happiness.

Well all this typing has made me tired. I need a nap!

I'm sure I'll meet many of you soon, word on the street is I'll be going to work with SPO soon.

Waggles!
Luz

Did I mention I love napping? I do!

Island of Reunion - Not a Fan

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Wed, 05 Dec 2007 03:16:00 +0000

Dogs used as Shark Bait.

Click the link, and get ready to be sad. If you want to start to get angry, there is a photo linked in the article.

Sometimes I fucking hate people.

Master Cleanse

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Sun, 25 Nov 2007 05:01:00 +0000

I just completed the Master Cleanse. I did it for 11 days. (Minimum 10 days suggested).
It wasn't about weight loss, it was about resetting myself. I started just living recklessly with my health after Satch passed away. Satch recently told me to get over it. Don't worry how, call me crazy, but he did. So I started by cleansing. I shat and pissed for 11 days. I decided to do the cleanse into Thanksgiving, since it is simply a holiday of gluttony, which is what I did not need. I feel great, my cravings are down, my skin is clearer. Go Life.

double bummer

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Mon, 22 Oct 2007 03:28:00 +0000

I'm officially out of the Philadelphia Marathon. My IT Band is not cooperating. I blame myself, I did not follow through well enough with my physical Therapy homework.

Also - Satch's license renewall arrived last week. Awesome.

Legs Do It!

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 01:50:00 +0000

I've officially signed up.

November 18th, 2007.

I started training a few weeks ago.
I've only almost shit my pants once.

Balls of Steel

noreply@blogger.com (spo) — Mon, 13 Aug 2007 04:03:00 +0000